What do you see when you look in the mirror?
Most of us, when asked that question will default to what we “perceive” as faults or flaws. Notice I said perceive, because this is subjective and from our view point, as we are more critical of ourselves than others are of us. What we think is beautiful others may find ugly and vice versa.
Not to mention, that a lot of our “perceived” flaws are because of what we see the media deem as acceptable. And if we don’t measure up, than something is wrong with us.
I know, as a woman, how hard it can be getting dressed in the morning, for a social event, or trying on clothes in a dressing room.
Instead of focusing on how certain clothes make us feel, we are highly concerned with what these clothes look like on our body, and if they cover and hide our “perceived” flaws.
I’ve been in many dressing rooms, turning around at all angles, wondering, “Do these pants make my butt look too big, or does this dress camaoflauge my thighs?”
These questions were also present even at my leanest weight, so being thinner or more fit doesn’t really change these thoughts and insecurities, either.
However, what happens to some of us when we look in the mirror, is harsh judgements about ourselves because of what our bodies look like.
For example, saying statements like these are very subjective and judgmental…
- I’m so gross. Look at these fat thighs. Disgusting.
- My arms are so flabby and ugly.
- I have fat cheeks and zits, no one wants to look at me. I’m sooo Ugly.
Statements like these are more likely to lead to feelings of despair, desperation, and wanting to shrink and not be seen.
However, what if we could switch to more neutral and objective descriptions?
- There is extra skin and stretch marks on my stomach.
- There is fat on my thighs.
- I have some wrinkles.
Statements like these are more likely to have us feel better and more neutral about our bodies. They don’t have the emotional charge that the subjective statements have.
I explain this concept a little further in the video below that I recorded for our Body Love Challenge participants back in February, you can watch it below ??
If you’re interested in learning how to feel more at peace with your body, feeling more confident, and accepting the way it looks, then reach out to me via email, [email protected], so that I can give you a couple of free resources to get started.
Talk Soon,
Tommie
Sources: “The Body Image Workbook” by Thomas Cash, PH.D.